What a day Journal!

I walked about in that blasted hole for most of the day. And after nearly 20 thousand potions..I did it..I ran out! I was at 91% and I ran out of potions! I rushed to Fartown..anxious to complete this level. I got what potions I could afford and ran back to that blasted hole in the earth. Its foul beasts moaning their anger at my days killing. I was there..deep in the bowels of it, running out of potions again. And I was saved. It may have only been 3% Dan..but you helped me to stretch my potions to complete that blasted level, and survive for the time needed to do it! I am eternally grateful to be blessed with friends such as you.

Having completed my training. I checked with the guild to see what service I could provide. And Cel was there..giddy as a school girl having just achieved level 51. Finally enough to gain her UW! And so I set out to search for a portal. While I walked, I thought back to the time when I myself needed that mysterious hole into the unknown. I remember coming through the wall, and I could HEAR her calling me from Bran. 'I FOUND IT!' She screamed. 'ITS HERE IN BRAN!' I was just stumbling along, thinking about the past, and then...I nearly fell into it...

I bet she heard me scream her name all the way in Dundee...'I FOUND IT!' 'ITS IN THE MOUNTAINS, JUST NORTH OF VERTHEGE!' She stepped in, and shook the world. Words cannot describe how proud I am of her. It takes alot to stick with it and get your UW...many in the lands have been here longer than us, and have not yet done it. Later on, she forged it into a weapon of light...*smiles* It matched her glow for the days accomplishments..

I spoke to Skye today. Kasi and her are great friends now *smiles* I am glad they are getting on so well. They both won a teleport scroll from the sandsculpting contest. Kasi made a castle, and Skye a messenger bird. They had a wonderous time..I am sorry I was not there.

Cel and I sat awhile with Anu, and he talked about what lay in store for us. *smiles* He knows alot, everytime I talk with him it seems I learn something. I found myself once more thanking the Gods I have such good friends with me.

My thought for the week:
Slower is Faster.....and thats the truth.

Oh it has been a few days that I will soon forget about I am sure. I can feel the sleep that I have gotten these past days rebuilding the flesh from my past wounds, and I am happier than I have been in some time.

I met with Shir today. She really is a good person despite what alot of people think. To my surprise, she was a rogue! I remember when I changed to warrior, it was the correct thing for me. But she, so high a level to make the switch! That took some courage that I never thought she had. She spoke at length with me about her past few days. From what I understand about the whole thing, she will probably come out looking evil yet again. But this is not the case! Pretense or no, some untruths were told, and Shir was not the one who said them! Oh I wish that I could warn her of these situations she gets into before she does, perhaps I can spare her the pain of them. But she is grown, and she makes good decisions. I know that good things are just on her horizon.

Az invited me to the contest today. I read the flyer and was quite excited to see Skye had booked herself a spot in it. I was even going to brave the crowd I saw gathering at Cerbies. But to my dismay, as I stood near the entrance, ready to step in, I did not see her in the crowd! I know how much she loves to sing. I am sure that she could have won the contest. I feel for her. I wonder if she knows the kind of faith that I have put into her. She has brought back the faith in women....No...she has brought back the faith in me that devotion does exist in the land. Though we have had a rough time thus far, the waves are worth the end I should think. Perhaps in time she will be able to heal the hurt that was dealt to me. Though, I am quite reluctant to test those waters thus far. She knows what it takes to stay with someone through the tough times, and with me, thats a reality. I am not a drama queen like some of the men here are, but I have my days. Journal, right now, it is Skye that keeps me sane, in this insane world.

Why is it that if there is some info to be had, that I cannot find it out just speaking to people? Alway it seems that mundane details..which involve me of course, are never told to me by the actual person that SHOULD be telling me, but by a series of random birds, that I have to decipher, then come to conclusions, then ask the person, then get answers. BAH! Its like I am back in school, only this time, I am the teacher and I have to decide what part of the rumor mill is actually true.

Oh well. The guild hall seems to be bursting, and we are near to a new room. Though it seems that no one really knows what they want in it. We will get there in the end, we always do. Our forum is in dire straits, but I managed to get it sorted out before anything serious happened. Now all that remains is building a new one, with the help of my great friend of course. She has rescued the Hammers..and I may be the only one who knows it as now..

I saw Skye last night. She gave me a pendant that she got when she was stranded in Euthucan. I quite like the way it looks..though it is a might heavier than my other. I am thinking that I need to make some big push in my life, in order to separate certain things in my head. I spend a lot of time being dazed instead of happy. I do not like it.

My thought for this week:
Mind games and lies by omission are far more painful and complicated than plain old honesty.

I awoke today and realised that so much has happened, and I have already forgotten so much. I decided that I need a way to remember it all, so that in my dotage, there will be no shocks to me as the memories fade, and time like so many things in this life, slip through my fingers. I trust journal that you will be my memory for me, and remind me of them in the many years that I have left waking....

So..I guess I can start with the last few days. I have been standing on the swamp path for ages, looking out at the Continental Doorway and thinking alot. It seems that I am destined to live in a life of turmoil and decisions. Many of which I do not like making, some of which I do. There are many who speak to me and keep me company in my hours of contemplation. Some even visit now and again.

Theres a simple peace in standing here, watch young adventurers heading into the swamp, some wandering there, others heading out to gain thier first good shield. And the older ones also. Heading out to the Guild Halls, or running about helping thier young charges. Either way, theres a simple balance to it, that is amazing to watch.

We are getting close to being able to build a new room onto the guild hall. I have been thinking long on this also, though it seems that the Hammers are having a tough time deciding just what they would like to see in it. Cel seems to have a handle on it, and even Gen is getting some planning in. I am sure it will be the best room yet.

I had it out with Skye last night. She is afraid to talk to me it seems, on some fear that she can hurt me by asking questions. Liela wants to help us both, but it seems..futile in a way. That fight if you will, is my main reason for writing in you today journal. Perhaps by writing out what I think, I can read it back and come to a better understanding of my actions? Or provide cheap entertainment for a passing traveler who find my pack as I train.

I think perhaps I will train..I can feel level 62..it is so close..Must train......